Recently over brunch & Bellinis, a mommy friend of mine asked me about an article that I published here on LinkedIn, 7 Sanity-Saving Tips for Busy Mompreneurs. It wasn't that she was curious about the tips in the article, rather she wanted to know why I felt so comfortable sharing that I was a mom and also a business owner. She mentioned that she was careful at her corporate job to downplay her responsibilities as a mother, and she felt that it was possibly a detriment to me and my business to actively promote that I am a “mompreneur.” I guess in the workplace there is still a concern that a mother will not be as “available” as childless employees, and that their priorities will be elsewhere, focused on the child’s emergency du jour, rather than doing their job.
Shelley Correll, associate professor of sociology at Cornell, found a "motherhood penalty" when she submitted nearly identical résumés for fictitious women applying for a marketing director position at a communications company. Some résumés said the applicant was active in the Parent-Teacher Association, a pretty obvious hint at motherhood. That cut the chances of getting a job by 44%. Follow-up research found that salary offers decrease with each additional child, Correll says.
A woman should not have to conceal the fact that she is a mom in order to get ahead in her career. I left law a decade ago to get away from the type of career that was not friendly to working moms. In law, I noticed that women had babies and didn’t return to work, or were not taken as seriously if they did return. At the law firm where I worked a decade ago, there were no examples of women who “had it all,” at least not the life I was looking for. I knew if I wanted a career and a family, I would have to make a drastic change that would allow me that option. Like Sheryl Sandberg says in Lean In, "We need more portrayals of women as competent professionals and happy mothers--or even happy professionals and competent mothers."
I'm not going to conceal the fact that I'm a mom. And I'm not sorry about it. I feel that since having my kids, I have become better at my job, and really focus now on things that matter. I’m a better networker, and find ways to connect with people, especially if they are also a parent. I represent a lot of baby brands, so I can relate to our clients’ target consumers and really connect with them on a personal level. I also realize that my children are watching me, and I’m setting an example for them about being passionate, hard-working, and proud of your work.
I’ve been thinking a lot about my friend’s statement since our brunch, and I’m here to say: I’m a mom and I’m a business owner, and I’m not sorry. The working moms, including my friend, I know are some of the most productive, focused people I've ever met. They know how to enlist the help of others, they know how to prioritize tasks, and make the most out of every bit of time in their day.
I know a mom who is a very senior executive at a Fortune 100 Company who performs her extremely demanding job primarily from her bedroom closet (It’s a really big closet!). She says it’s quiet in there, and she can be away from the noise in her house and really focus. She is an incredibly productive and effective person who can write her own ticket career-wise. She also happens to be a very present and dedicated mother.
Another friend of mine started her own tech PR firm a few months after her second baby was born. After just 2 years, she sold it to a larger, rapidly growing agency, and is now a partner heading up their LA operation. She travels quite frequently, but she always finds time to take her children to swim lessons, concerts in the park and weekly playdates.
These examples are not the exception, rather they are the rule. Here are more reasons why moms make kick-ass entrepreneurs & employees:
Moms are masters of time-management & efficiency.
We get up early and stay up late. We delegate. We make lists. We crowd-source. We ask for what we need, and don’t take more time to complete a task than is necessary.
Moms focus on what matters.
We don’t have time for unimportant tasks & commitments that take us away from our families, getting our work done, or accomplishing our goals. We figure things out… quickly. Because we have to.
Moms are skilled multi-taskers.
We take conference calls from the parking lot while picking up our kids from school. We write proposals while pumping breast milk. We return email on our iPhones while waiting at the Pediatrician’s office. Bottom line, moms can really do a lot, and be really effective in doing all of it.
Moms know how to work under pressure.
Our kid is home sick from school, and we have a conference call and a proposal due. There’s no time to panic. We just figure it out, enlist some help, move things around, and make it happen.
Moms have great people-management & negotiating skills.
We can handle siblings who refuse to share, convince a kid who only wants to wear his “garbage truck” fleece sweatshirt in the 100 degree heat of summer to change into something more suitable, and get the pickiest of eaters try to eat something "squishy." And this is all before we arrive at work at 8 am! Dealing with clients, bosses & colleagues are a piece of cake compared to engaging with a stubborn potty-training toddler.
Moms are badass managers.
We manage the household, we manage the kids’ schedule, and we manage our businesses. There are a lot of moving parts, and moms can usually manage it all. I'm not saying things are always perfect, but it's always good enough.
The bottom line, and I can say this with confidence and from experience: Moms get sh*t done!
Sure, I might be limiting my opportunities by promoting the fact that I’m a mom, but if you have a problem with it, you’re not the kind of company I want to work with, nor the kind of client I want to have. I’m a mom, a wife and a business owner. And I honestly think I do a pretty darn good job at all of it. If you’re not OK with this, we likely aren’t a good fit. I’m a mom. Sorry, I’m not sorry.
